Hazel has not been sleeping well since her surgery...so, needless to say, we have not been sleeping since her surgery either! Last night, like many other nights, Hazel was up at 3:30am. So, mommy was up at 3:30am. I am not going to try and paint a pretty picture, portraying me as this patient, all loving, selfless women that lives and breathes only to serve her child...so of course I feel guilty about that.
I am not going to pretend that by 6:30 am I wasn't looking up flights to New York (just because the thought of an empty hotel room seemed like the most peaceful place inside four walls at that moment). I am not going to pretend that I wasn't giving Hazel her bottle while my head was resting on my pillow, with only one eye open to see if the bottle was actually hitting the target area. I am especially not going to pretend that I didn't call my mother at least 20 times from 7 am to 9 am to see if she could come and relieve me so I could close my eyes, if only for a few minutes. I may or may not have taken a nap with Hazel's sleep sheep on full blast next to my head so that if she cried it wouldn't disturb me (that's what her Nonna was here for). When my dear friend came by to drop off some icy treats, I may have, most likely, not brushed my teeth or changed my pajamas's...it was 4 o'clock. I may have gotten a text from my husband wondering if by 5 o'clock I would still be home or in NYC? Don't judge me...I know most of you read along nodding in understanding, remembering and reliving those precious moments that you have all had.
I love my kid but sometimes sleep trumps love. Trust me I know there are people out there who have it worse, but I did ask if you wanted the truth. My truth...just for today...that was the truth.
In other news...Hazel is a huge piggy and ate a whole cube of sweet potatoes. Pretty ridiculous for the first time eating them. We bonded over a lovely meal, followed by some lovely milk made just for her, and then snuggles for daddy.